Day 1 Excercise: Writing about your writing space experience

I am on my bed. The pillows and bed sheet and blankets crumpled awkwardly beneath me. My back

protests as I raise my head to type on the uneven surface. My arms shaky from yoga want to

rest, unmoving and still; but I am typing this. . . each key giving way to my gentle tapping of

fingers sounds nearly like the slow patter of a spring rainfall. The kind which is slow but

sure -drenching every exposed bit of earth to it's saturation point.


Wonderingly there are other noises overlaying the determined patter. There is the chatter of

children, the buzz of the blender, the insistent consistency of a script played out on the

computer monitor's screen. The sounds create a cacophony of unperturbed noises, non-competing

with the others -cohabiting. One child has started to sing about all the lonely people. The

Beatles' songs we heard this morning inspiring his sweet untrained voice to repeat the chorus.

Dreamily some voices rise and fall smattered with giggles and protests. I can smell the fading

scent of peanut-butter cookies, of dog, of dirt held beneath the edges of things -which waits

patiently for the clean rag to come, knowing the priorities of this family lie elsewhere.. .


Mixed in with selfish relaxation of a weekend with only small plans and small goals the

priority is on togetherness. On facing these small challenges with grace and abundance. Though

money is not in evidence when I look at the furnishings. They are reclaimed pieces which do not

so much go together as they have become fast friends with their neighbors or, at the very

least, have partnered with the abutting piece with grudging acceptance. Who could ask more of

the antique treadle sewing machine and the press-board shelves holding cast off games some still

labeled with thrift store stickers?



My place here is as varied as anyone else's. I am a mother with a stiff back which seems as

though it might be an inherited condition on my mothers side. One which may at some point

require surgery. Painful though this might be I have inherited more good than difficulty from

my mother and I am grateful every day I am her daughter.


I have a past of joy at least at first glance but as many of us know personally there is much

pain and darkness just below the first surface we share with the world. We can only but be

honest if we're asked. But lets be honest here too, nearly no one asks. This is acceptable and

problamatic. We can bear it but we also bear these painful pieces of past if we can share with

another soul the reality within which arises from these darker streaks of patina. We all know

this. And so we search the sea of humanity for a listening ear. Even if we have one at home we

often consider the idea that there may be another out there somewhere. . .but I digress.

I would like to introduce the others of the home. There is a dog who is obsessed with the rabbits

who reside here as well some in the yard some indoors. There are even some infant bunnies. I

can only imagine the temptation the dog deals with. She is a proven killer of rabbits. Deadly

dog that she is she loves her humans and gets along with nearly all the cats. Even the yard poultry have a

tolerable no harm agreement. Her relationship with the kittens of the home are most amusing.

 When they first arrived they reminded her too

much of rabbits with their soft fur and cuteness but rabbits do not turn and face larger beasts

with fierceness. These not-rabbit-kittens swiftly re-directed the dog and now one is her best

pal. The other cats merely disregard the dog as much as they are able with cat patented

nobility and haughtyness. Good dog. Even better cats. It is like the UN in this home and the

children reap the benefits though they know it not. The parents know as they watch their

responses to experience. They youngest son, whose ability as a spy and cat burglar was well

established in our community at the young age of 3, makes collages espousing his priorities of

nature and family. His older sibs share interests in cooking, writing, dancing, horseback

riding. . . They are children who are siblings and there are 5 total. Two parents

(the one who types and the one who blends) and also outside are 4 ducks 4 rabbits, a chicken and a

rooster. The 1/3 acre is quite full.

Yoga

Ok who wants something challenging and seemingly completely unnecessary in their lives that yet holds infinite power to change and ground you in yourself so that you may branch and grow and become? I guess I do.

May I suggest, Yoga? My personal favorite is (of course) a class with a strong knowledgeable instructor. But as of yet that is unaffordable (at least for me). Next best bet: video. Most of which are yuck. However I have found that quality has been improving over the last5 years. You can now find some decent video yoga if you look.

SO the winner for favorite all time video yoga is. . . Yoga Today! They have a massive library of Yoga Videos that are very well done. It is challenging however and I will admit I do not do all of the poses in all of the videos. I often will go to the nearest calming move such as a forward bend or child's pose when I am feeling the need to recenter during the practice.

If you sign up with them (it's free) they give you one free streaming vid to practice with each week! I have yet to be dissapointed. I haven't gotten any irritating emails to junk or anything, of course I am always careful what box I mark when I sign up for anything.

On a Cartwheel scale of one to 10 I give it 9 Super Fast in-a-row cartwheels.

Runners up are:
Oxygens's Inhale with Steve Ross- he is fun and has groovy music 6 Cartwheels
Power Yoga for Every Body- Barbara Benagh et al- very well done and has over 20 workouts! 7 cartwheels

Well that's all folks Cartwheel on yoga style.

New Favorite Quote

Nature knows no pause in progress and development, and attaches her curse on all inaction.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Woah

My time has been swallowed recently, as the lack of posting can attest to. I think that it has been, for me, a great review of why one does not waste time however nor should one pile too much on ones plate. I have found that spark of motivation and connection yet again and am trying to find some way to define it's resurgence. Is it the sunlight coming back? A dietary change? My fear of repetition? Who knows but hopefully something will manifest to point a finger or several fingers to illuminate an answer. If you have any ideas on why there is this ebb and flow in motivation and how to discover the reasoning behind the tide I would love to hear/read it.

A pep talk

I think that those of us that have periodic run ins with the quintessential "Bad Day", ahem pretty much everybody, should consider writing a missive from your cheerful powerful self to your insecure-slovenly-bad-attitude-to match-the-bad-hair-day self.

I have moments where I am in such a fabulous mood and I feel so strongly rooted in myself that I know that I could handle just about anything well. When I unconditionally believe in my ability to handle both the rocky path I see and the thundering I hear that holds the possibility of an incredibly large waterfall just around the bend, when I feel that flexible inner strength, knowing I can accept both my failures and my successes with equal grace, this is the feeling I wish I could evoke on those days.

Those days.

I have a plan, a wonderful true to my goals and my essence plan! I am one of those people that feels better when I have a plan, I also like to fly by the seat of my pants but I'll take a plan if there doesn't happen to be a flying carpet available.

SO here is the Plan: write, draw, sculpt, create a scent or texture that captures your good day when you are having a good day. Make more than one project, write more than one poem, novel, letter, or paint more than one canvas, rock, etc, (if possible) then hide it, save it and wait.

When needed break glass. Not just any glass (though that is it's own type of therapy for some) rather I mean the glass ceiling that you mind has created sticking you in the day of your nightmares. Break it with your own personal insight into your unique flavor of joy. Then determine your commitment to bear that joy in your soul. Cleave close to you mind that strength of purpose and do something that embodies your vision.

Allow yourself to be filled with purpose and forward momentum.

Giving

I have just remembered recently the power of giving in our lives. Honestly, when I do give in a mindful state of awareness my energy sky rockets. It is a testament to the new research that is coming out that proves that "healthy" brains are hard wired with compassion and perhaps generosity as well. It is a true wonder when we explore our true natures with out the baggage that says "To come out on top some one must lose and by the way it better not be me".

Giving and laying all yourself into a task is freeing in ways that surprise me I wonder if I will ever be enured to this feeling of grace and wholeness. I hope not.

For more information see
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/05/27/AR2007052701056.html
http://www.news.wisc.edu/14944

Jess

The Value of Disorder

I just decided that I need to write on this because, damn it, I seem to have a lot of disorder in my life and my deep faith tells me that there is a reason for everything. Yes, everything. The socks on the floor that had a match for a total to two seconds after they made it through the front door, the piles of jackets, toys, backpacks, the book case over stuffed with stuff come on you know what I mean, right? Maybe not, I know that there are people with neat houses who do not clean all day long. Seriously. How they do it I think is a state of mind.

I think maybe disorder tells us something about our lives. It gives us an external clue of when we are on the mark and when we are not.

It is not only whether there is a mess but also how we feel about the mess. There are messes that we look at and know there is order just underneath not very far below the surface of what we see. Then there are messes that do not bother us at all because we look and instead of a true mess we see our choices made and accepted. We went to visit the grandmother an hour away instead of doing dishes or took our child to ballet after work. These messes are temporary, we can feel it in our bones; it is when we despair and the mess seems permanant that we should look at the clutter and disorganization as a clue to an inner state that needs our compassionate attention.

What does your environment tell you? How do you listen?